


Our broken fairy tale

by Once_upon_a_midnight_story



Category: The Order (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, eight years after season 2 finale, what might have been
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:48:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29653617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Once_upon_a_midnight_story/pseuds/Once_upon_a_midnight_story
Summary: Eight years after Vera left Belgrave, she come back and Hamish has to face the consequences of her returning in his life.
Relationships: Hamish Duke/Vera Stone
Comments: 14
Kudos: 26





	Our broken fairy tale

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all! This is just a short thing that I was planning for a while, I kept on editing repeatedly until I decided that it was high time to publish as it was!  
> English is still not my mother tongue and I found out I have a huge problem with past tense so if you spotted terrible mistakes, feel free to tell me, I am here to learn honestly.
> 
> Anyway, hope you like it!

It hadn't taken long for the whispers to spread across the campus, and even less for the news to reach the ears of the members of the Hermetic Order of the Blue Rose. She hadn’t been seen on heard for many years, she seemed to have disappeared from the face of the earth. And now, just as suddenly as she had left, the former Chancellor of Belgrave University, the former Grand Magus of the order just reappeared.

Hamish Duke was sitting in the teachers' lounge, a cup of tea in one hand, a pen in the other, ready to correct another pile of his students' essays, when a group of colleagues entered the room with mixed expressions of surprise, disbelief and reverential awe. Emily Burke, a vivacious and warm brunette, adjunct professor of archeology, approached him with her eyes shining in excitement.

"Have you heard the big news Hamish?" He shook his head and shrugged, he had been cooped up there all morning correcting students’ works, he had no chance to catch up on the latest faculty gossip.

Emily rubbed her hands together and almost jumped in impatient joy, "Chancellor Stone! She's here! And she'll be giving a series of lectures for a couple of weeks to explain the results of her research over the last few years! I mean she's such a genius! My dissertation is full of references to her work!”.

A thousand thoughts seemed to strike Hamish, his body shook as if it was pricked by millions of invisible pins. He walked quickly out of the room in a rush for air, muttering a few words to his colleagues. His head buzzed, his heart beat twice as fast. She was here. Vera was back.

Heaven only knew how many times he dreamed and wished to see her again. For months his mind had lingered in fantasies of her. She would knock on his door, beautiful and mysterious as ever, and he would hold her in his arms swearing to her and to himself that he would never let her go again. Or he would accidentally bump into her on the streets of an unfamiliar city, they would look at each other for endless moments, and then he would reach out and touch her face tenderly and ask her to spend the rest of their lives together.

Yes, for a long time Hamish Duke had spent nights and days imagining what might have been, waiting for a word, waiting for her to come back. He had wandered through the house that had so often seen them share a meal, a glass of wine, intimate moments and whispered words, yet without her it was cold and lacking in warmth.

And then, the days passed and the pain and loss faded into a dull ache and widespread numbness.Gradually, the moments when he remained motionless and stared at the void lost in a memory became more and more sporadic, almost non-existent. Only at night he did let her break through his dreams and fill his heart with warmth and joy, painting a reality that would never happen.

He was doing well at last, his life was going fine now.But she did decide to come back, irreverent, disruptive as only Vera Stone could be. And he wasn't so well anymore. He hadn't even seen her, and the pieces of his soul that he had tried so hard to put back together were already showing signs of breaking down.

He had no idea what to do, where to go.Going home didn't seem like such a great idea and going to the temple was out of question, Vera was probably there at the moment and as much as he wanted to, he still didn't feel ready to see her again. He needed somewhere to be alone for a while and clear his head of all the thoughts and emotions around Vera Stone. 

Where had she been all those years? How was she? Did she change or was she still the one he remembered, sarcastic and blunt and tender and compassionate at the same time?But what he really wanted to find out was whether she had ever thought about them, about what they had shared, whether the time they had spent together had been important to her too, or whether he had just been deluded.

He had imagined to spend the rest of their lives together and she had left. Another woman he loved just abandoned him: when Cassie died, he had acted reckless, nearly dying more times he liked to remember, until he found a new scope in his pack. With Vera, well, he had responsibilities, a duty, he couldn’t just sink in alcool and sorrow; deep inside, however, he still hoped to see her again one day, he had lived waiting the exact moment in which she came back.

With a pang of guilt, he reached for the phone vibrating in his pocket and watched as Selena's name appeared on the screen with a short text.Not even for a minute he had thought about her, too engrossed in reflections on Vera. The reality of his life hit him with ruthless clarity: Hamish's world had always revolved around Vera Stone, whether she was close to him or not hardly mattered, and now by his refusal to see the truth he would inevitably hurt Selena who had nothing to do with it.

He rubbed his face wearily with one hand, feeling his heart sinking into his chest, a strange sense of anger took him by surprise.He kicked a broken log, hoping to vent some of his frustration, cursing himself internally for how blind he had been. He felt irreparably trapped in a life he would never have chosen because of the one-sided decisions of a woman for whom, despite everything, he still had deep feelings, a woman for whom he would give his life even after all that time.

———

The temple was noisy and crowded: a full blown party was taking place, drinks were poured, people were happy, light-hearted.Things had definitely changed in recent years, not only there were more acolytes, but finally the Order was selecting them not only on the basis of their family heritage. They had learned the hard way what arrogance and complacency could do, and the new Grand Magus had taken up Vera's original challenge to change the Order and was determined to teach the next generation that having magic was a privilege and came with responsibility and restraint.

The Knights had done well too: they had slowly been accepted into the group, the war with Praxis had given a good shake to many acolytes who realised the importance of wolves and how vital they were in maintaining the natural order of things.

From the dark corner he'd been hiding in, Hamish looked down at the pack with a faint smile, thinking how far they'd come from the reckless, daring children of their early years to responsible people, experienced practitioners and brave wolves. It hadn't been easy at all, but the end result was definitely satisfying.

"Are you planning to hide here all night?"

"I admit the idea crossed my mind, Lil. But I think I'll leave as soon as it's deemed socially acceptable."

The girl snorted in amusement. "You know you can't avoid her forever, right?"

"I could..."

Lilith shrugged and began to walk away from him not before throwing him a meaningful look that told him to stop talking shit and get a move on. Hamish watched her approach Nicole and sighed reluctantly.

He pushed himself away from the wall he'd been leaning against, eager to refill his now empty glass: if he was going to make it through the night it would take more than a few drinks. He walked briskly towards the bar, trying to look around as little as possible, afraid to meet the one pair of eyes he wanted and feared to see, until someone grabbed his arm gently.

"Hey stranger!"

Hamish looked at Selena, straining to give her a smile that turned out to be more of a half-guilty, half-resigned grimace. She looked at him calmly, the smile never leaving her lips, which surprised Hamish: of all the reactions he had imagined, the understanding and acceptance he saw reflected in her eyes was certainly not one of them.

"I'm glad Vera's back, honestly. Even though we're over..."

"She chose to leave, the fact that she's here is irrelevant." His words sounded harsh and bitter, his eyes suddenly veiled with a deep sadness.

"Look me in the eye and tell me honestly that you will not ask her to stay or beg her to allow you to go with her wherever she is hiding these days."

He said nothing and broke their eye contact full of guilt at himself and his idiocy. His gaze wandered around the room for the first time that evening and suddenly he saw her. His breath caught in his throat, his eyes ran entirely over her, looking at her like a man who had lived in a desert and finally spotted a source of water. She wore an emerald green dress that fell softly and flared over her hips, her hair came to just below her shoulders and her face had a few more lines. She looked different from the Vera he was used to see day after day at the Temple, but she was still the same woman he had fallen so hard for years ago.

Selena was focused on Hamish's face as he looked at Vera probably for the first time, judging by the fact that he had been hiding in a corner since he arrived at the Temple. Astonishment, affection and total devotion were all written on his face, which didn't surprise Selena at all: she knew Hamish was still in love with Vera and would be forever, but the young woman didn't care so much. She and Hamish were good together, they understood each other, they weren't madly in love, that was true, but at least they were attracted to each other and respected each other. It was more than most couples had these days.

"You know," she suddenly interrupted the silence that had settled between them, "sometimes you call her name in your sleep. No, please, don't feel guilty, I have always known that and I was fine with it. She is the love of your life, Hamish." She spoke the last sentence with a fierce conviction that astonished them both.

On impulse, Selena threw her arms around his neck, holding him tightly and whispering in his ear: "Don't let her go away again". And with that she let go of him and walked away, noticing Vera staring intently at her clearly having seen the exchange between her and Hamish. Selena gave her a smile and a nod while leaving the Temple.

———

It hadn't taken long for her evening to become a blurred haze of faces, smiles and extended hands. Or rather, it had taken one look at him and his partner to make her cross the line between pleasant brio and near drunkenness. She was certainly no longer used to drinking so much and the effects were clearly showing in her tentative, unsteady step on her high heels.

She had been irresponsible to return to Belgrave, it had been too long, everyone's lives had changed so much, she was just a figure from the past, probably controversial and divisive but still 'history'. She was obviously out of place, that night had made that abundantly clear, but by now it was too late to go back into the shadows, she just needed to hold on a little longer.

The alcohol was making her dizzy and confused, unable to concentrate on a single thought, far from focusing her attention long enough to figure out which way to go. It was late, she would have to return home, to the house she hadn't had the strength to sell but which was now cold and unfamiliar. _But where was her home now?_ The question swirled in her head for several moments, the multiple meanings underlying seemed to taunt and mock her, the effect of a mind intoxicated by liquor.

But why had she been such an idiot? She was doing so well, striving to be as charming and intriguing as the Vera Stone everyone remembered or heard of. And then she'd pulled her eyes away from her interlocutor for a moment and seen them, him and her embraced, close, intimate. And at that point she hadn't cared anymore, she had just wanted to sink into a dark corner and drown in her own pain.

She had thought about him constantly for the last eight years, after all, every day she had a reminder of him before her eyes. She wasn't naive enough to believe that he would cling to the memory of her as a silly romantic fantasy, God, she wouldn't even want that for him. But imagining him dating other women and seeing it with her own eyes were quite different things. She wasn’t supposed to be there, to come back in his life and ruin everything, again. But he needed to know the truth, she had to tell him about…

"Vera...." She suddenly froze in her tracks. She didn't need to turn around to know who she would be facing. And indeed, she didn't turn around; she continued to stand motionless on the pavement, her gaze forward without really seeing, her hands trembling.

Hamish took her elbow gently to support her unsteady pace and without a second thought guided her towards his flat. They had avoided facing each other at all costs, but now a confrontation was necessary and inevitable.

As soon as she sat down on Hamish's sofa, Vera kicked off the killer heels she was wearing, sighing with relief. "How did I put up with them before, I never..." she muttered a little incoherently.

"It's not the only thing you can't handle anymore I see," he told her, trying to hold her gaze even though Vera was making every effort to avoid him. He sat beside her, taking one of her hands between his own, stroking the back of it with his thumb. He immediately felt the change in Vera's breathing and smiled, considering it a step forward.

"Vera...," he murmured softly, "why are you here?"

She swallowed heavily and closed her eyes, trying to hold back the tears she felt bubbling up and wanting to prevent him from being able to read all her emotions as he was once so good at.

"I... I'm a selfish person... I wouldn't be... I would... I'm so... I'm sorry Hamish." She was shaking, her body was wracked with sobs and she was unable to avoid it. She had waited so long, imagined a thousand times what it would be like and now they were sitting next to each other and she was unable to do anything but burst into tears without having even said an intelligible word.

"Vera, hey, Vera, talk to me! Please. Love, whatever it is, it's okay." He held her tightly against his chest stroking her hair in a calming gesture but that seemed to make her tears worse. Hamish was unable to do anything but hold her in his arms and wait until she was ready to tell him what was weighing on her so heavily.

"I should have come years ago," she finally said, still gasping for air from her outburst. "I was just... well, never mind. It's been so long now that I think you're going to hate me and..."

"No! Stop!" he interrupted her firmly, "Vera, I don't hate you, I couldn't," he shrugged as if to emphasise the absurdity of it. "You're here now," he added as in second thought, "and that's all that matters, really."

Vera bowed her head resigned to the inevitable consequences that the confession she was about to make to him would generate in Hamish's life and more. She reached into her bag and pulled out a slightly wrinkled photograph, a sign that it had been held in her hands often. She held it against her breast for a moment, an instinctive gesture of protection, but then handed it silently to the man beside her.

She saw a thousand emotions pass over Hamish's face, disbelief, fear, dismay, but what prevailed was joy, an overwhelming, irrepressible happiness that made his eyes sparkle. Those eyes filled with emotion stared at her in awe, waiting and begging for her to confirm what he instinctively understood in an instant.

"This is Victoria, she's almost eight years old and the light of my life. I couldn't have done it without her all this time."

"Please..."

She nodded slightly. "She...she's our daughter Hamish."

"Oh... Vee, I couldn't... I will never hate you for this… You're so..." he shook his head, trying to clear his brain and form a meaningful sentence. He took her face in his hands, wiping away the tears that were still falling down her cheeks. "Vee, love, this is incredible. Oh my God, we have a daughter together. Vee, you can't imagine how much time I spent imagining a future with you."

"You should hate me. I should have told you before, it was just complicated and as time went on it got even worse and for the first time I my life I had no idea what to do. "

"Every night, for months, I fell asleep thinking about what I would say if you come back. I wanted to be angry at you but I couldn't be, I will never be. All I could think about was how much I missed you, how much… I love you Vera! Yes, I wish you could tell me about Victoria before but, you are here now, I know about her now. There is no sense in speculating about the past, Vera. We should think about the future now.”

She looked at him in disbelief and in a gesture that would have been unusual for the Vera of the old days, she threw herself at him, holding him tightly, hiding her face in his neck and inhaling the familiar scent.

"There's so much I need to tell you, I don't even know where to start," she murmured softly, never letting go of her hold on the man.

"Tomorrow," he whispered in her ear, "we have time."

"Hamish...," Vera glanced at him hesitantly, "can you... could you just... hold me, for a while."

He simply smiled, adjusting himself on the couch so that they could both lie down quite comfortably, and then pulled her against him, kissing the side of her head.

"Go to sleep, Vee. I'm right here. I've got you, love."

She closed her eyes and slowly allowed herself to be cradled by his warmth and the rhythm of his heart. In that instant she realised that everything was going to be alright.

**Author's Note:**

> So what do you think?  
> For now this is a one shot, however, I don't exclude the possibility to write something more related to this ""universe""


End file.
